Old But True Story - No Need for a Background Check

What seems to be many ages ago, when I worked for the Sheriff’s Department, I went to this burglary call. A small convenience store in the country had been burglarized. - Yeah, we say burglarized, even though burgled is technically correct.

The front window next to the door was broken and items had been taken in what appeared to be “in a hurry.” Only really important stuff, like beer and cigarettes had been taken. Maybe some magazines had been too. That was the obvious stuff anyways. I really don't remember if Slim Jims and chips were stolen.

At the time, we did not know if any cash was gone. There was a busted open case of Old Milwaukee Light with a couple of cans left behind, so obviously the thief had impeccable taste in beer. :)

Of course, one more item was left behind in the parking lot - a checkbook. Guess what we found when we went to address on the checkbook? The guy’s car was in the driveway, still half- loaded with stuff from the store. You know we had a sense of humor – we told him we were there in reference to his lost checkbook. We had a nice pair of matching Smith and Wesson bracelets for him too.

So, to be your own detective is not always rocket science, as often the people you are checking on are closer to the bottom of the “food chain” than the top.


  1. I'd like to know why the term got changed from "breaking and entering" to "home invasion". Is that supposed to make the creep sound nicer or something???? Or are those two terms unrelated?


  2. They are related. "Home Invasion" was originally used in the cases of assaults, rapes, and murders. I am not sure the history, now though I will have to check :)

    It is all breaking and entering, but I think home invasion was to put a more personal attitude towards the crime.

  3. lol, I love 'dumb criminal' stories.

  4. Dumb crooks also applies, surprisingly, to con men, too, Barry. I did a blog piece last year (deep in my Archives) about Katrina, and the way the amateur con men of New Orleans scored big in many different rip-offs of the Feds. These dopes barely knew what they were doing, yet came away big winners.

  5. There was a lot of federal money ripped off - the after Katrina relief may be the biggest ripped off project in recent history!

  6. I am glad that I am not a criminal. I would probably do something utterly stupid like that myself. I am constantly amazed at the things people think they can get away with.

    P.s. I love caffeine myself. Will never, ever give it up!

  7. Wow, smart criminal huh? Seems like he really needed the beer!

  8. Yeah, he wanted it bad I guess. Of course he had already had a few, so I am sure that helped influence his "good idea"


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